I've got a new man in my life...

I’ve got a new man in my life… 

Or better yet, I SHOULD say that our whole family has a new little man in our lives! That’s right… Baby S has made his debut, and every one of us is thrilled!



Jacob (Jakey) (JJ) (You name it...)

Here’s how it all happened…  

Since many miles divide us, Todd and I had sat down with Megan and Joe over the weekend of the baby shower. We asked them directly how they’d like all of this to play out, and when we should plan to make our pilgrimage to the east. Once we all got to voice that we wished the whole situation was different, we accepted the fact that it’s not, and decided how to proceed from there. Since Joe had time off from work for family leave, the kids decided to use that time to go home from the hospital and get used to their new big/little reality. They asked if we could come out to Connecticut near the end of that time – that way Todd and I could give Megan a hand with the baby, and help around the house, as Joe went back to work. It makes total sense on paper, and we agreed to it; but I kept thinking that if anything went awry, or if anything changed, we’d just pick up and go sooner. You just never know, you know?

It was pre-determined that the baby’s birthday would be July 15 – about a week before his actual due date. It was a crazy thing because on the morning that Megan and Joe reported in at the hospital for her surgery, Megan felt that she was already having contractions, about 8 minutes apart. We all concur that indeed, the 15^th was to be his birthday one way or another. 

Joe was able to be part of the delivery. He sat alongside Megan and talked with her, supporting her as only a best friend can… and these two are definitely best friends. The doctor pronounced “It’s a boy!” and the two felt so happy. As she was wheeled off to recovery, Joe watched as they washed, weighed and measured his baby son. What a feeling!

Look who's here! Jacob Joseph

Joe kept us in the loop with messages and pictures of their new addition. My immediate first impression was that the baby looked like him. Finally we got the news we’d been waiting for…  Megan was recovering well and the baby seemed to be healthy and happy. (Tears) (Praise God!) They proudly announced that Jacob Joseph was here, weighing in at 7 pounds, 1 ounce, and measuring in at a whompin’ 20 inches. 

We’d played a baby name game at her shower, and each guest announced their favorites.  Afterwards, I asked her if she’d heard the name that she and Joe had chosen, but she said “No.” This surprised me since quite a few solid names were shared. She and Joe picked one they felt was strong, and one that worked well with their lengthy German last name. I think they did a great job. Jacob… my new favorite name!  

Todd was at work, but we talked on the phone and congratulated each other about being grandma and grandpa. We planned to celebrate later when he got home. Tony and Lesleigh, who happened to be in town, and happened to be staying at our house that day, congratulated me and each other, all sharing in Megan and Joe’s wonderful news together.

I spoke with Megan on the phone from her hospital room and she sounded good. From a thousand miles away, it isn’t always easy to assess emotion or what the two might want or need; but she clearly sounded good that day. Anyone who’s had a baby knows all of the mixed feelings that pump through new parents; but I must say she sounded upbeat.  

Later that night, Joe set up Skype from their hospital room. Since Tony & Les were here, the six of us (excuse me, SEVEN of us) gathered around and were able to see each other and exchange the priceless experience. Through all of the distance, we were able to see the new baby in his mother’s arms, witness the kids’ smiles at each other, watch them place tiny kisses on the baby’s soft head, hear their birthing experience and watch them as they told it. My oh my, how technology can be a gift…!

Skype session from the hospital - Amazing!  

I’ll be honest – it’s hard having this new grandma title, without being able to hold the baby. But as everyone around me keeps saying, “Soon – you’re going to be there soon…” Soooo…. for now we text, and skype, and chat on the phone a bit -- not a lot of time for that, after all, rumor has it that babies are life changing and take a lot of adult time and attention! Oh man, how exciting! The next generation begins…  

Baby Jacob has brought new experiences to us all so far. Obviously, Megan and Joe have never been parents before. Todd and I have never been grandparents before, and Tony and Lesleigh have never been uncle and aunt before. It’ll be fun for us all to try out our new roles on this lil guy, and we’re all ready to meet him up close and personally.  

Until then, thank God for FaceTime. (Seriously!) :) 

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of "Five Fingers, Ten Toes - A Mother's Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference." For more information, visit her website at www.katiekolbergmemmel.com 

We've Come a Long Way, Baby...

Good morning!                    

 

I just love a good Friday morning in June, don’t you? It’s summertime, it’s almost the weekend, it just feels so… “hopeful,” doesn’t it?  

Speaking of “hopeful,” I had a neat experience recently. About a week ago, I spoke with my daughter, Megan, on the phone and asked what she and Joe were up to. She said that they were going for a maternity photo shoot.  

Oh, okay… I thought. Now don’t get me wrong - I’ve seen the types of photos that she was referring to; but I’ve got to tell you that just a generation ago…? We did not participate in this sort of shoot. Something has happened over the course of 20-30 years that has added this category to the photo shoot list of musts: engagement photos, wedding photos, maternity photos, newborn photos, 3/6/9/12-month photos, family photos, pet(?) photos…

Me and Baby Tony at my Baby Shower  

For us, an engagement photo meant that some night before going out to dinner, if we looked a little better than usual, and if we were engaged at the time, one of our parents pointed the camera at us and said, “Say cheese…” Because we still bought and used rolls of film, there was a good chance that one of us had our eyes shut, was talking, or was reaching for the camera. Two photos were usually clicked “just in case.” The photos often sat in the camera for six months or better, usually until after the holiday season, when people took more pictures than usual. We then submitted the roll to Walgreens or Target or one of those little photo developing places in a parking lot, and waited a couple of days for developing. 

We did have a wedding photographer. Todd’s brother (Timm) agreed to follow us around on that day and snap shots of us – probably looking better than our usual selves. Again, after the wedding we took our five or six rolls of film to Walgreens and waited.

 

A maternity photo was usually snapped at our baby shower. I can’t speak for everyone, but at that time, having gained 50 or 60 pounds, I think my response was something like, “Do we have to take pictures today?” and of course we did have to. I felt so self-conscious, so unworthy of photo attention. The shots didn’t turn out so bad, and I’m glad I have them to show the kids, but my heart wasn’t really in to being photographed.  

A newborn’s photo was snapped in the hospital nursery. A photographer would go in, and while the baby had their little knit cap on, swaddled from head to toe in receiving blankets, snap a picture of their sweet little face. Sometimes hands were showing, sometimes just eyes, nose and mouth.

 

Tony and Megan after our one-hour photo shoot 'wait' 

I did take the kids to Sears for a six-month and a year-old photo. After that, we again relied on our own cameras most of the year. I remember one incident when the line (no appointments necessary) was so long that Tony got all sweated up playing for the hour prior. His hair is slicked back and I’m laughing right now as I type, remembering his rosy red cheeks and wet hair. Ah, the good ‘ol days… 

THEN, this week Megan posted some photos from that maternity shoot that I mentioned earlier.





Megan, Joe and Baby S





Maternity Photos: Keane Eye Photography, LLC 

 

This next generation is really on to something. The photos were absolutely beautiful. Some were posed, yes, but incredibly natural. Instead of a young woman waving the camera away (like I did all those years ago), she embraces the way she looks and the baby growing inside. The photographer also captured the love that Megan and Joe share. I remembered at the kids’ wedding, after they’d said their vows and walked back down the aisle of the church, I saw Joe pick up Megan and swing her around. That was the joy they shared that day, and these photos show the joy that they are sharing on this day – as they wait for their little Baby S to appear. It just seems so… “hopeful!”



My beautiful daughter and our grandchild... (sigh)

I was so impressed, and may I say, moved to tears? 

Where did my little girl go? I used to gather her hair into a ‘whale spout.’ She wore braces for several years. She got glasses when the school’s blackboard grew fuzzy. She dated, she married, and now she’s going to be a mama… 

I think that these photos are also extra special because we’ve had the thousand miles of physical distance between us. It’s a wide separation, and though we’ve seen her a couple of times this year, it’s been so special to visually witness this part of their present life.  

Can I ask you a favor? Baby S is supposed to arrive in less than three weeks. Please keep our family, especially Megan, Joe, and the baby, in your prayers.

 

Until we blog again…

 

 

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of “Five Fingers, Ten Toes – A Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference. For more information, visit her website at: www.katiekolbergmemmel.com 

 

To clean or not to clean...

Hello!

            I have a teensy tiny confession to make. This week, from out of the clear blue yonder, someone (a.k.a. my sister) “dropped in” on me. Now, you must try to understand… for Todd and me, and the way we “keep house,” dropping in is not our best or most favorable option. When my doorbell rings, I freeze, imagining every horrific scenario. It’s such a blasted conflict of interest too, because I really do enjoy visitors – and I really do enjoy my sister. I guess I just really really (really) need a heads-up – 24 hours is preferable, but even 30 minutes can get me a quick fix. 

Here’s the real deal, okay? (Take a deep breath here.) Todd and I are both a bit  (for lack of a better word, I’ll create one…) “Pack Ratty.” It’s true. It’s not like they’re going to film a reality TV show about us or anything (at least not yet…); but we really do have a lot of “stuff’” and our “stuff” may or may not be absolutely necessary to our day-to-day living. If you are unsure about your own state of “Pack-Ratty-ness,” allow me to provide you with a few examples, so that you can compare: 

When the kids lived here, we’d/I’d say things like, “Oh my gosh you guys, your rooms look terrible!” (The word “sty” may have even been used a time or two). Sometimes I’d make them a deal – usually at the beginning of summer vacation. “Tell you what – if you clean your rooms really well, I’ll buy you each one CD of your choice.” Each child, feeling encouraged by my offer, went to the kitchen cabinet and withdrew a big, black Hefty bag. They knew that along with the actual dusting and vacuuming associated with cleaning, also came the “let’s take a load of old clothes and toys to Goodwill.” The children would put on music and get down to work. 

I’d feel pretty good about myself. Here it was, mid-June, and I had the kids motivated to clean, plus they even “whistled while they worked.” I’d throw in a load of laundry, make a shopping list, and then meander down the hall to glance into their rooms, just to see how things were going. BIG mistake, BIG! 

I’d see a stack of items on my daughter’s bed and I’d point. “What are you doing with those?”

 

“That’s the start of my Goodwill pile,” she so innocently admitted.  

“What? You can’t get rid of this! (I’d hold up a sweater that was probably borderline too small on her.) I love this sweater on you! Remember the time you wore it with…?” And so on, and so forth, I’d give examples of how and why she couldn’t possibly get rid of whatever item was on the chopping block. Finally, she’d relent, and hang the sweater back in her closet. I hate to admit this, but these types of conversations took place until the day she got married and moved out. I do not believe that she is “Pack-Ratty” in her own home, like her dad and me. Time will certainly tell...  

It was surprising to me to find out that not all people act the way that we act. Who knew? Some people actually enjoy getting rid of clothing that doesn’t fit, and actually enjoy donating their kids’ old toys to people who’ll use them. For example, not everyone holds onto a high chair in their basement for twenty years because some day their five-year-old might have a child and bring that child over for dinner, and what will that child sit on then if we get rid of the high chair today?  Note: The high chair is now yellow and is heading to the dump this weekend because no child (grand or otherwise) would ever safely sit on it again. Did we learn our lesson? Hmmm…  

We’ve actually had some sane adult family members and friends who’ve offered to go into certain rooms in our home and dispose of items for us. Oh, the horror, oh, the trauma… “Absolutely not!” We exclaim. “We’ll be going into that room soon – very soon, and making the tough decisions for ourselves.” The sane ones nod as though they understand, but… I’m not really sure that they do. 

And just so that we’re clear – it’s not just me! Todd’s lower level, his section of the basement, is – well – let’s just say that it’s full. Every so often, on a rainy weekend, he’ll say, “I’m going into my workroom and I’m going to organize. If I’m not out in two hours, throw me a lifeline.” 

“Okay, Honey, you do that,” I say. I’m not sure of any real dent he’s ever made in the clutter, but I know that he loves to be in that room.  

On rainy days, many women like to clean. I do not. Rainy days are made for many things, but I’m afraid that cleaning is not one of them. Okay, obviously I’m kidding (a little bit anyway). The house isn’t that bad, but I do enjoy just about any other activity more than housework. 

One thing is true though – once you’ve been caught – once that doorbell rings and it’s not the FedEx man – once that porch person says, “Suuure, I’ve got an extra half hour and I’d love to come in for a Diet Pepsi” – you’re totally busted, my friend. It makes you stop and re-evaluate your time management skills. It makes you want to drag out the broom, the mop and the 409, the vacuum and the webster/duster thing, and get down to business. 

But it’s a funny thing – just as soon as she left that day, my phone rang. It was my daughter. The sweet sound of her far-away voice said, “Hi Mama Llama, how are you today?” and all thoughts of grime removal washed permanently from my brain.” 

“Hi Hon, I’m good – how are you? How’s the baby?” … And an hour later, scouring the bathroom was the furthest subject from my mind. 

I’ve never had a particularly immaculately clean home – that is true. But I do like to think that I’ve always taken time out for the people and activities that matter the most to me: My husband, my kids, pets, church activities, writing, reading books (or anything else), going to movies, watching TV, meeting friends for coffee, talking on the phone, going for walks… ;)  I think you catch my drift…  

Have a wonderful day! 

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of “Five Fingers, Ten Toes – a Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference. For more information, visit her website at www.katiekolbergmemmel.com   

Showering Baby S (not with water)

Joe, Megan (Baby S), Me, Todd

Isn’t it crazy the way time can fly? Sometimes it drags by super slowly; but when it’s moving, WOW, it really moves fast, doesn’t it? That’s how the past few weeks have seemed here in Waukesha, Wis. - crazy and moving fast.

About two months ago I spoke with my daughter Megan, and we penciled in a date for her baby shower: Sunday, May 3, 2015. Since she lives in Connecticut, early May was at the tail end of the time she’d safely be able to travel a long distance. I hoped and prayed for good weather so that flights could take off and land, uninterrupted. (They did…)

Joe’s mom (Bonnie) and I decided to co-host the event and the planning began. I drafted the invitations, which stated that the baby is believed to be a male. J We divided them up and sent them out to our respective family members and friends. Bonnie and I got together to shop for decorations, favors, and food items. We even sat down together for a lunch. We shared a few laughs as we plotted out the list of odd jobs we’d split between the two of us grandmaws. 

In the meantime, Tony and Lesleigh came to town for numerous work commitments, and a little ‘family time.’ It was such fun to see them and spend time de-briefing about all of the exciting opportunities that they are working on and working through. I cannot even describe to you the amount of positive energy these two bring to our now-mostly-quiet nest. There’s always something crazy going on…

Time snuck up on me, and before I knew what hit, it was Friday - time to pick up Megan and Joe at the airport. I’d arranged a brunch for them to see some family members, especially my 92-year old dad.  It was fun/interesting for me to sit back and listen to Megan talk about the various things going on in their lives. It was sort of a “Fiddler on the Roof” moment – (sing) “Is this the little girl I carried…?” She seems so happy, and is so well-spoken. I’m shaking my head as I type, unsure of where the past 26 years have gone exactly… Then Todd and I took the two of them out for dinner Friday night, where we discussed scenarios of our upcoming trip to Connecticut (post-baby). The kids spent most of Saturday with Joe’s family, and finally the day of the shower arrived.

Several of us met at the church hall, where we began food preparation. Some decorated the space with crepe paper and balloons. Guests arrived, all so full of joy to see the kids again, and to share the excitement of showering them with needed items for their growing family. Since everyone knew the kids were flying in, some shipped larger gifts directly to their home. For a lil guy, “Baby S” has now got a whooole lotta neat “Shtuff.”

 

One of the neatest gifts came in the form of a video. Our daughter-in-law, Lesleigh, had the idea of interviewing “moms” of all ages and stages, on three basic topics: “What food cravings did you have while you were expecting? Since you've been parenting, what’s a funny thing you/your child said? What advice would you like to share with a mama-to-be?” As Les and Tony toured this spring, she collected film clips of sweet, funny, heart-felt tid bits from moms, and assembled them into a dear present for Megan and Joe. Before the gift opening, she showed the finished product to the roomful of women. There was much laughter, and even a few tears. I think it’s something Megan will watch many times and enjoy, over the upcoming months and beyond. I'd like to say a public "Thank you" to the lovely ladies who shared their wisdom here. I’ve included the video, in case you haven’t seen it yet:

 

Later that evening, Todd and I sat and watched as Megan and Joe packed up their things and prepared to leave early the next day. It felt a little strange in a way. We knew that the next phase for us all would now include the baby. Up until then, we’d had the shower to focus on. Now, the next step – giving birth. Our daughter’s going to be a mom. We are actually going to be grandparents. Not just a title or a concept – actual grandparents!

Mother's Day is tomorrow, and I, personally, have been thinking about it a bit differently this year. Years ago, the focus was my own mom, then added Todd’s mom. For a long time now it’s been me (the mom) thinking about my own two kids, and then added in their spouses; but now a whole new generation is ushering in. Wow, you know? Sometimes I wonder what the world will be like when Baby S (and all of these new little children) grows up, goes to college, tries to make a living. ...But that’s a bit far down the road for today, isn’t it?

My guess is that we won’t even be able to guess how it will be for the “up-and-comings.” We’ll all just need to do the best we can, and trust that (as most people/parents/grandparents do) somehow it’ll all work out the way it’s supposed to.

“…God willin', and the creek don’t rise…”  

Signed, "Soon-to-be Gramma" Katie  :)

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of “Five Fingers, Ten Toes – A Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference.” It is available on Amazon, both as a Kindle download, as well as a paperback. For more information, visit www.katiekolbergmemmel.com 

A Rainy Friday Night in April...

Hello there!

How’s everybody doing out there? Here in Waukesha, Wis., Spring has not thoroughly sprung. It has teased us a bit with occasional 60-70-ish degree days, but overall it’s still pretty chilly. The upside to the April chill is that we still have a whole lot of May’s warm goodness to look forward to.

I wanted to take a moment to share something with you all that recently turned out to be inspiring as well as a lot of fun for me. First I want to say that I swear I meet the nicest people in the world. Back in August of 2013, Todd and I attended the Helping Hands Midwest picnic in Ohio. Here’s the link to the blog post I wrote about that:  http://katiekolbergmemmel.blogspot.com/2013/08/helping-hands-midwest-picnic.html   Along with many other folks, we met a young family from northern Illinois. They did not attend the gathering in 2014, but I could see via her Facebook posts that she’d gone into business by opening a coffee shop.

A couple of months ago, out of the clear blue, she messaged me and asked if I’d be interested to come down to her shop and do an author event. She hoped to coordinate so that Tony could be her musical guest. Her hope was to make it out to be a Lucky Fin family event. I’ll cut to the chase and say that her request worked out perfectly with Tony and Lesleigh’s Spring tour. The event took place this past Friday, April 24, and it was so special. Todd also wanted to participate, so he took off a few hours early from work, and drove me down to Long Grove, Illinois.

Lesleigh, Tony, Me, and Todd at Beans & Leaves in Long Grove, IL

The coffee shop, Beans and Leaves Coffee & Tea, https://www.facebook.com/pages/Beans-Leaves-Coffee-Tea-Cafe/108511809972?fref=ts is in a very eclectic and artist-y area of their town. I told our hostess, Ethel Robey-Berger, that it reminded me of Wisconsin’s own “Door County” tourist area. Ethel had hoped that our event could be held outside on the shop’s patio area; but (and you know what I’m going to say next) it was approximately 45 degrees and raining. ;)  Soooo… inside we went.

Tony and Lesleigh were already there and setting up when we arrived. Since we were to share the stage as an Author/Singer/Songwriter evening, Tony and I had decided that I’d start off the evening, speaking about our early days. I spoke to the intimate “Standing Room Only” crowd about how a young couple (Todd and me) went from meeting, dating, and living as young marrieds; to the parents (me, now a stay-at-home mother) of a child born with a limb difference. I shared Todd’s and my differing life approaches, and how much I worried. I had so many questions – would Tony ever play sports? Music? Find love? I spoke about some of my early feelings of stranger’s stares and questions, and how I eventually chose to educate others through my responses. “He was born this way,” I’d say. I believe that choice has made all the difference in all of our lives.

 

I then left the stage area, and Tony and Lesleigh put on an inspirational concert. He told stories of how certain songs came to be. He invited Lesleigh to sing with him, and they shared their harmonies with the crowd. Many kids were present, and so he interspersed childrens’ songs into the show. As always, the whole crowd sang along to “The Lucky Fin” Song, which often leaves ‘some people’ ;) teary. Here’s the link for the song/video, just in case you’ve never seen it.

 

 Right before the end of the concert, I went back on stage and wrapped things up. “Remember all of my early questions? How I worried if he’d play music, or if he’d find love? Well… how’s he doing?” I assumed from the crowd’s applause that they feel he CAN play music well, and that the kids’ marriage and love are apparent. To end the show, Tony played “America to Go,” which is one of my all-time Tony Memmel fav’s… (yes, I admit to having many, but still…)

 

After the concert, people came up, introduced themselves, and chatted. The kids sold CD’s and I sold/signed some books. It was great to see some familiar faces from the Illinois chapter of the Lucky Fin, and it was also great to make some new friends. But for me, I think that the highlight of my night was meeting a young woman who is anticipating the birth of her unborn Lucky Fin baby. She and her husband came out to hear Tony play and to meet him in person. I think (I really do think) that seeing him and Lesleigh perform, meeting Ethel, me and several other families of kids with limb differences, was a big relief/support to them already. They now know they’re not alone, and that many people have been where they are – and most of all, that life can be so good, so positive, for our kids.

After we left the coffee shop, Ethel and her family took the four of us to a local Italian restaurant. We shared some good food, along with lovely conversation about everything from how they met, to their kids’ school experiences, to music, to parents, to retirement… a little something for each of us. It’s always such fun to get to know new friends, isn’t it?

Anyway, I want to take this opportunity to thank Ethel, her family, her employees, the Lucky Fin families who came out, and the Long Grove community for welcoming us. What a great way to spend a rainy Friday night in April…! 

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of “Five Fingers, Ten Toes – A Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference.” It is available through Amazon:   http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_c_0_13?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=katie+kolberg+memmel&sprefix=katie+kolberg%2Caps%2C182

For more information about Katie, her book, her blog, and her writing go to www.katiekolbergmemmel.com 

 

   

Remembering Hands 2 Love Camp

It is so incredibly hard to believe that a whole year has passed since Todd and I were invited to attend Hands 2 Love Camp in Gainesville, Florida. Last year at this time, we were busy planning, plotting, and packing.

We met so many lovely people - both adults and children. Not to mention that being from Wisconsin, we were able to absorb some of that gorgeous Florida sunshine for a few days.

When we got home, I wrote a blog post all about it, and decided to share portions of it again. If you are going to the event this weekend, have a wonderful time. Thanks to every single person - both staff and families - for your hospitality to our family. It is not forgotten... :)

Written in April of 2014: 

Todd and I flew into Gainesville, Florida - a part of Florida that we'd never visited before. The camp was set on a lake’s shore with cabins scattered around the outskirts. It was a very pretty sight. Todd, Tony and I stayed at a motel. The number of camp families had grown so large that some of the attendees stayed at the motel too.

The weather turned out gorgeous – if you enjoy blue skies, temps in the low 80’s, and a light wind blowing thru the trees. On Monday, as I sat at my dining room table looking out at the snow swirling around in my back yard (again!), it was hard to believe we just experienced all of that beautiful weather the day before. Though I love my Wis. home, those warm breezes surely did call out my name…

Everyone at the camp welcomed us with warm smiles and hugs. It was such fun to finally associate faces and names to certain Facebook friends of mine. Every so often someone came up to introduce herself to me, and we’d smile and laugh as old friends – which of course we are! Oh, social media - how you’ve changed the world! Ruthie showed us around and explained what we’d be doing on Saturday. How strange it was for me to be back in a camp setting after so many years. It brought back wonderful memories of my own experiences attending 4-H and church camps. Isn’t it amazing how things ‘stay the same’ even as they change? Think about it…  

On Saturday morning I felt a little nervous. Todd and I planned to host four parent sessions throughout the day, while their kids attended a music clinic with Tony and a drumming specialist. The subject of our sessions was “Networking.” I remember so clearly being a young mom, trying to find other families to connect with who felt the same way I did. For many parents those feelings still ring true. Let me say this… the world is not always kind, as we all know. But when you are raising a child with a ‘difference,’ when you’re often on guard, watching for people’s reactions, listening for hurtful comments, it can be – well – it can be exhausting. This was a weekend where the parents felt peaceful, ‘at home,’ their children could simply ‘be.’ Since everyone attended for a united purpose, there was never a time for them to feel signaled out or alone. Everyone there was in it together. I hoped and prayed that Todd’s and my message would be heard and well-received because working with these young moms and dads is one of the joys of my life - truly.

Our outdoor location could not have been more fantastic. We sat high up on a hill, with mossy trees providing our shade. We looked to our left – lake. We looked to our right – lake. From the nearby rec center we heard the sounds of the distant drum clinic, and our son’s voice leading a chorus of children in “The Lucky Fin Song.” What a rough way to spend a work day, you know?  A tough job, but somebody had to do it… ;)  The beautiful setting seemed to remove any apprehension.

As I prepared at home the week before, I came across this statement about networking:

“Be amongst others who share your dream.”

I believe that all parents dream for their children – I know that I did and still do! We dream about their futures, what choices they’ll make, what line of work they’ll choose, who they’ll meet (and possibly marry someday)… These parents are coming from many miles to network with other parents who all share a similar bond. Every one of them shares their life with a person (mostly a child) with a limb difference. So as they network about their beautiful kids, as they share what works and what doesn’t, as they laugh or tear up, they know they’re “amongst others who share their dream.” The feedback I received was that, at this time in their lives, nothing is better than that. The date for camp is marked on their calendars already for next year. The countdown has begun.

Camp ended on Sunday morning. Tony spoke to all of the kids and adults, showed the captive audience how he “tapes up” with Gorilla Tape every time he plays. He talked about persistence in doing what you love to do. He sang a couple of his songs. And finally, at the end, he led the whole children’s group in “The Lucky Fin Song,” and all of the kids did hand motions. If there was a dry eye in the place, I didn’t see it. An emotional slide show ended the morning, showing all of the special things (archery, art, music, ropes course, etc.) the kids had done and accomplished throughout the weekend.  Click here to see the Lucky Fin Song video from August, 2013:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3Q8pRO_4MI&list=PLAB4186F7073B844F

I want to personally thank all of those at Hands 2 Love who take their time, energy, resources, and love to host this camp each year. They’ve grown ten-fold since their beginning 14 years ago. Who even knows what the future may hold? All I know is that when I was a young mother, it was awfully difficult to find someone who understood what I was feeling. There is growing support out there for all of these parents who want to network, and “be amongst others who share their dream.”

…and there’s a message in there for us all...

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of “Five Fingers, Ten Toes – A Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference.” The book is available thru Amazon. For more information, go to www.katiekolbergmemmel.com

Good News! It's a ...

Well hello!

How’s everybody doing today? We’re good here – in fact we’re very good here – especially since we recently received some exciting news. Before I give the final verdict, however, allow me to provide a few details.

If you missed my blog post about “Megan and Joe and their big announcement,” I suggest you read it now so that you know exactly what I’m talking about. Here’s the link: http://katiekolbergmemmel.blogspot.com/2015/01/megan-joe-and-their-big-announcement.html

It’s been fun for Todd and me to have this exciting new life adventure to process. We’ve been discussing scenarios of how he and I might structure our visit to Connecticut this summer - to see the baby, and spend a little time helping out any way we can. Sure, I can cook something, or wash a few dishes or loads of laundry; but mostly, I’ll want to sit and hold the new baby, rub that soft head on my cheek, talk with Megan, and listen to every last detail of her birthing experience. Todd will probably want to go off to fix, assemble, or build something – anything at all. We’re both hands-on, but in very different ways. Hey – we all play a role, am I right?

I spoke with Megan, as well as Joe’s mom, and we’ve got a date on the calendar for the baby shower. I’ve mailed the invitations, so now it’s time to start purchasing crepe paper streamers and cut-outs of storks - and planning the menu, of course. Nothing says, “Welcome Baby” like ham sandwiches, chips, cakes and cookies. Together, both of our families hope to usher in this sweet little one with plenty of soft onesies, t-shirts and sleepers, snuggly blankies and bottles. Ah, how soon we forget the amount of gear that one must tote during the infant and early toddler years.

Now that Megan is well into her second trimester, she’s feeling pretty good. Yes, she’s tired much of the time, but that’s normal. She’s experienced many of pregnancy’s expected milestones. She recently said, “I’m as hungry as a teenage boy.” And as her baby bump expands, her pants are feeling a little tighter. She’s begun to enjoy the feel of the baby’s tiny kicks, and has even experienced her twenty-week ultrasound.

To be honest, I felt anxious about the ultrasound too, but not just for the news it might bring about the baby’s gender. Certainly, finding out whether it’s a boy or a girl is quite wonderful; but I admit that the test also brought me a bit of anxiety. I’ve written about this before, but I’ll say it again. As a mom, I love my own kids more than I love myself – and I’ll openly admit that I’ve already added my unborn grandchild to that love list as well. So as the date of the ultrasound approached, I just hoped and prayed for a good outcome for the new parents, and that the baby would look healthy and happy on its snapshot.

…and it does…!

Megan called after the test and she sounded relieved and thrilled. She described how her morning had played out, how the tech had measured and scanned, etc. and that all appeared to be in order.

“Yes, the baby resembles Skeletor, but that’s to be expected right now,” she joked.

Tears (good ones) escaped from my eyes, and the inevitable shakiness that always seems to find its way into my speech, was unmistakable when I said, “I’m so happy for you and Joe!” Finally, we hung up so she could call her dad and give him the good news too.

# # #

Have I made you wait long enough? Now that you know everything looks good, and that the baby appears to be happy and healthy, do you want to know what I know?

Well… it’s a BOY!

And, although I’d say this if it was a girl too, we really could not be happier.

Here’s to the happiest and healthiest of babies! (Cheers!)

Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of "Five Fingers, Ten Toes - A Mother's Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference." For more information, visit her website at www.katiekolbergmemmel.com