Hi Everybody! How’s it going today?
To be honest, things have been a bit strange around here
lately. I’ve been thinking more and more often about how it feels to be getting
older. Now, when I say ‘getting older’ I don’t mean the way it feels to go from
age 15 to 16, when you feel that awesome sense of anticipation because you’ll
soon be able to drive. Or the feeling you have when you’re turning 21, and
finally going to bars and buying your first legal drink. I’m not even talking
about going from age 39 to 40, which many people dread because it sounds so
“ooooooold.” ;) No… Age fifty is far
behind me, and I’m solidly 55; and at 55, I’m seeing some significant changes
in the ways we live our lives. Allow me to explain…
First of all, Todd’s and my conversations are beginning to
revolve more around retiring from
employment than about working at the actual employment itself. We’ve started
taking a much sharper view of our finances, and examining what and how much we save
today, may benefit us someday down
the road. For us, it’s no longer about making mortgage payments or running up
sky-high credit card balances, as much as it is about 401K’s and mutual funds.
I don’t know… Sometimes I love that we’re in this new phase of life. I mean,
there’s certainly nothing wrong with
it, and it’s certainly not a bad
place to be. It’s just kind of… ‘different’ from absolutely everything we’ve
done up to this point in life.
It’s weird too because crazy health issues start seeping
into everyday conversations. A dinner doesn’t go by when one of us isn’t
explaining that “This hurts,” or “That aches,” or “I think it’s a little better
than it was yesterday,” or “Maybe we should call the doctor about that
tomorrow… ” You name it, and a couple in their 50’s probably discusses it. For my
older friends and readers out there, I bet you know exactly what I’m talking about. I remember when my own mom started
saying things like I’m saying. One of her common sayings was, “It takes me
twice as long to accomplish half as much.” It’s just so different. I mean,
there were days, years ago, that all we discussed was soccer or baseball schedules, school
concerts, babysitting jobs, and “Who’s going to walk the dog today?” When did
everything suddenly become about our backs and shoulders and eyes and other odd
items that shall remain nameless... you get
the picture.
I was talking with my daughter on the phone recently, and I
told her I was feeling a little bit melancholy. She pointed out how many
funerals I attend, and I hadn’t even really considered that as a reason for my
malaise. She’s right. Todd and I really do attend a lot of funerals. I attend even
more than he does because sometimes they’re scheduled in the middle of a work
day. Since I have more flexibility with my time, I’ll often go alone; but if
it's on a weekend, we tend to go together. I bet we attended at least twelve
in 2016. I know this isn’t that unusual.
We’re at the age when this starts to happen. We try to get to as many as
possible to show respect. It makes sense. Why, I remember when my own parents
began this phase in their relationship. I was in my 20’s at the time, and it
felt like every time we spoke on the phone, they were stopping at a funeral
home for a neighbor, friend, or relative. They’d often just matter-of-factly work it
into their busy days. “We have a few errands to run, we’ll swing over to the
visitation for “Delores,” and then we’ll stop and grab a burger before we head
home.” Their casual tone felt so strange to me; but dang…! Here we are now,
too!
Anyway, Megan told me to write a blog post about it, and I
hesitated, hemmed, and hawed. She told me, “Mom, people like it when you write
about real, everyday struggles. Most people are probably going through a lot of
what you are. I think it would be good for you to get it out. Write it down!”
She’s so precious – I tell my kids all of the time to “Write
it down!” and now she’s telling me
the same thing. Which brings me to a whole ‘nother topic: Have your kids become
your teacher yet? They really are smart sometimes, aren’t they? Perhaps that’s
a topic for another day… ;)
Anyway, I really appreciated my daughter’s take on this and
for advising me to write this post. I pray that my readers understand what I’m
trying to convey. Between the retirement talk, the health stuff, and the funerals,
I also need to say that I’m extremely grateful to God to be healthy enough to
discuss retirement, health, and funerals - both in my real life as well as
right here on my blog, with you all.
As always, thanks for reading!
Until we meet again…
Katie Kolberg Memmel is the author of two books: “Five Fingers, Ten
Toes – A Mother’s Story of Raising a Child Born with a Limb Difference,” and
“Silly Stories and Sentimental Stuff.” Both are available through Amazon as an
electronic and paperback version. For more information about Katie and her
writing, visit her website: www.katiekolbergmemmel.com
#GettingOlder #Retirement #AdultKids
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